And now, a dignified message from President Donald Trump, regarding his former and current secretaries of state: Presumably Trump is reacting to the fact that Rex Tillerson, who was ignominiously fired by the president this past March, had described his former boss as someone who regularly encouraged him to break the law. He also called Trump “pretty undisciplined” and someone who “doesn’t like to read,” which, honestly, is still lightyears nicer than the time he allegedly called the president a “fucking moron” last October. Nevertheless, now Trump is doing his Trump thing, only—and maybe it’s just me here—he sure seems to be kind of phoning it in. No goofy nicknames? No alliteration? Just “dumb as a rock” and “lazy as hell”? Sure it’s mean, I guess, but doesn’t exactly have a whole lot of oomph behind it, right? Don, my man, we all know you can do better! In any case, I hope everyone is enjoying their Friday afternoon—except Trump, who is probably glaring at an extremely burnt steak and screaming that he will “never log off!” to no one in particular.